June Softly

Friday, July 8, 2011

SCREW STURGIS PARTY

WARNING! ADULT CONTENT... HOWEVER...
If you are under 18, (you probably know more about this subject matter than your parents....) Please practice safe sex always... like I always say... “If you have a nice piece of meat, keep it wrapped, or it’ll go bad!”






Bag Lady Sue

Please take a moment to read the comments page.  It is what I am most proud of.  Write to my Email and I will be honored to post all of them I can! 
Thanks -Bags   Read More



SSG Wavie S........ CMR ... Box .....  Apo AE 09033, please send him a care package he’s in Germany now fixing to ship to Afghanastan. I was at Hogrock and seen u kick a@@ thanks. Roger



Dear Suzanne, I am writing to thank you so much for the package you sent me. I am not sure who gave you my name, but I am very grateful! The video is hysterical! I shared it with some of the guys in my platoon and they laughed so hard I thought some of them might crap themselves! We have not had a moment like that in so long, you are a doll. It is citizens like you that help make our time here worth more, and bearable.
Blessing to you and your sweet daughter.
Hope to catch a show when I get home.
Thanks again!
Most Respectfully, SGT. Andrew. T.  U.S.M.C.
Location: A godforsaken desert  far, far from home. ;)
P.S. I will get a pic of me and the T shirt and send it to you as soon as I can.



Hi Sue,  
I really wanted to thank you for a wonderful weekend at the rally...   like I said before if it wasn't for you the entertainment would have SUCKED!!!!!
My ex that wrote you sent me a copy of your response to her email...   lol
 Thanks again for a wonderful time and I hope we get to hang out soon again... 
Your 2nd Favorite Body Guard....
Mark...:)
P.S.  I might be trying to get to PA for that rally, remember I told you I had a Lady there I dated, might try to schedule a visit during the rally....


Dear Lord you ARE kiddin me! You're just nothin but filth woman:) Out there making most folks laugh who barely crack a smile. How come other raunchy comedians can book shows that aren't biker rally's? Fuck Girl! You are booking the wrong places!!!!! xo Scootercrazy in Mn.


Thanks for accepting me as a friend. Your shows are great. I was fortunate to catch your show while at Sturgis. I hope you can make it down here too.
Have you tried the Angel City Spring Rally? Skyrider


Bags,are you ever coming back to conesville again......someone told me you wasn't??  Wildhog1


Hi Sue, I was feeling down in the dumps and was leafing through Hustler magazine ( can you believe a woman reading that shit? Most women I grew up with or know/knew think it's one of the crudest porn rags out there, but that's why I like it. I was featured in there in 1993. Made a hit with the college boys haha :)) and came across the article which featured you. I was LMAO so loud when I was reading some of your jokes in there. Especially the one about guys talking about tit jobs and well..."how about coming home with six more inches of dick you little fucker??"  It's about time a woman told things like it is...there's too much polite comedy out there. That's why I like Hustler. No airbrushing, no smoke and mirrors. Just good raunchy shots.

I read your biography on your web page which went into greater detail than what was in Hustler and I give you ( and all the strong ass women out there who can survive on their own without husbands) and your mom so much credit for being single parents. I also wanted to tell you that I'm one of the strangest paradoxes in the world...I'm an Asian chick who grew up in a very proper, suburban college-educated family who went bad after she got out of...CATHOLIC SCHOOL! Yes, that fucked me up for life, Sue. Nothing like trying to come onto a handsome priest in the confessional only to find out the fucker wanted a young BOY and not a cute young girl.  After I got out of college I decided to become a stripper, and I had a great time. I never regretted that. My mom and dad were like, wow, this is what we paid for that college...so our daughter could become a Hustler model and a nudie chick on stage. Seriously, they were cool with it. My mom's philosophy is, " If you got it, flaunt it before it sags."  But seeing as how I have a boob job, doubtful they will sag anytime soon. I can picture it now. If you see an old Asian woman in a rest home and she's trying to fend off the horny old guys with a crowbar, that's most likely me. I'll be 80 years old with perky tits.
 
 
Your humor is dead-on....
Keep the comedy coming, Sue. It's appreciated by everyone!!
 
Michelle 


This was my very first trip to Sturgis and friends told us that we had to see Bag Lady Sue.  They did not tell us anything about you show so I had no idea what I was in for.  I have to tell you that I thought your show was INCREDIBLE.  I have seen over 200 comedians and I have to say that you are one of the best I have ever seen.  I caught two shows at the Broken Spoke and I would see you again and again. 
Have you ever toured Canada ?  Have you ever considered touring Canada ?  I think you would have sold out shows everywhere you went. 
Thank you for making my trip to Sturgis more enjoyable.  I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely, Yours in Conservation,
Dahrlyne




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Suzanne Austin as the lovable character “BAG LADY SUE” has become one of the most re-requested performers, and one of the top draws at clubs, concerts and motorcycle rallies all across the U.S.A.!
A nationally and internationally known stand up comedienne, activist, writer, actress, and mom, Suzanne Austin  has toured the United States from Alaska to Florida bringing riotous laughter to literally hundreds of thousands of fans.   Read More




Suzanne, Or “Bags” as she is called by those who know her, is a fearless, fun loving spirit, and an avid troop supporter and motorcyclist, who performs from coast to coast at Rallies, nightclubs, concerts, fringe bars, military bases,comedy clubs, and just about every where that doesn’t have rides for the kiddies! She also does many charity events throughout the year. She even sends free care packages with her DVDs, T-Shirts, photos and letters to our active duty troops, when requested by a friend or family member, at her own expense, and asks folks to do so at the end of every show.  Read More


Bag Lady Sue - Lynyrd Skynyrd Concert Demo


Sturgis?
NO... Gettin a little to communist for me these days.
BUT!
My old man will be on all the billboards and ads up there for VICTORY MOTORCYCLES! If you see one, take a pic and send it to the old Bags eh?

Hard as it is to believe, no one seems to know what the f*ck is going on up there anymore. Thanks for all your letters!

HOWEVER!!!! I have decided to have my OWN SCREW STURGIS PARTY Here in Denver! SAT. AUGUST 13th, 2011 @ The VILLAGE TAVERN in HURON ST. in Thornton, CO. Band(s) Bikes, Bitches, Boobs and BAGS! Comedy and music, food and even a few fun vendors! No cover. Stop on it, party will be on all afternoon into the night. Bags show @ 6:00pm-ish


Visit Bag Lady Sue official website

Want Sturgis Rally Event info?




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